If you have recently experienced a break up and find yourself wondering how to get your ex back one of the first things to do is take stock of how you are doing emotionally right now. Are you crying all the time over every sad song you hear, or about things that remind you of your ex and all the good times you had together? If being emotionally distraught is your most common state of mind right now it may serve to get you some needed attention, but after awhile your ex and the other people in your circle are going to get very tired of the drama and wonder why you won't make some effort to pull yourself together. The Hollywood stereotype of the moody, depressed lover may be popular on the big screen, but it isn't going to play well with your ex girlfriend or boyfriend. And while you may not realize it, if you continue to let your emotions run wild it may be your way of avoiding the reality that there are some things you will need to change if you are serious about wanting to get your ex back. You also need to ask yourself if you are actually sad about the break up or are you ADDICTED to the feeling of sadness and heartbreak instead? It's important to be careful here because very intense emotional states will release chemicals into our cells that become addictive over time and that's part of the reason you will find people caught in the same cycles of behavior, experiencing the same dramas and making the same mistakes. Their cells are actually looking for another chemical fix and this triggers the behavior patterns that cause the emotional state all over again.
The easiest remedy for this is to recognize when you are doing it. Sometimes we get so involved in our own dramas that we don't realize what we are doing and that we are repeating the same cycles of behaviors over and over again. Once you catch yourself doing this a little light bulb in your brain goes off and you start to reverse the pattern.
Now you will start to feel a little more in control and ready to take a more positive approach to get your emotions balanced and your self confidence back. Be glad about the fact that you are getting smarter about your emotions and use this time away from your ex to work on yourself and what you need to change. Doing things that make you happy and help you to feel better and stronger will not only increase your confidence, but will also make you more attractive to your ex boyfriend or girlfriend.
Then you are ready to begin learning how to get your ex back - the SMART way!.
Hi I'm Claire Tourney. Check out my Squidoo Lens How To Get Your Ex Back-The Smart Way to understand how your emotions may be hurting your chances of winning your ex back and to discover a PROVEN, effective plan for winning your ex back.